Origins of awesomeness,
Yesterday night I was thinking about how enlightened I am, I am pretty awesome and sometimes I take some time out from my busy schedule (Msn, walking up and down Wilmslow road etc) to reflect on the qualities Allah (that's God for you dirty infidels) has bestowed upon me. I began to enquire about the origins of my awesomeness, and I think I can just about pinpoint the exact moment where I started to become an enlightened Zen Master.
I used to work as a data entry clerk, they give shitty jobs respectable names, for reasons unknown. Basically some guy/girl scans a document in to the network, it then appears on my screen, and I type it out. You look at your screen , you type what you see. The forms were tax refund forms from the Inland revenue, you'd look out for the muslim names or names that sound like swear words, you got the odd Vanka, you got the odd Focker. This becomes routine for the next 6 weeks, 5 hours a day, 5 days a week. 6x5x5 is 150 hours.
In the background, deadlines approach, 3 weeks become 3 days which become 3 hours, which becomes a week extension when your teacher takes pity on you.
You work hard and eventually you meet your deadline only for another one to be set, you work harder, finish it quicker and then again another deadline is set, the cycle continues. Unbeknown to you the 'end' switch is staring right at you, it's that little glimmer in the back of your head, you could see it clearly if your fat Indian workaholic boss would move his ass.
Growing up you're told anything is possible with hard work, this is one of those white lies people can wash their hands of when it doesn't materialise. You see for Raqueeb entering 15,000 characters in a hour was possible, however when it came to running across the office without gasping for air things got harder, infact impossible.
It is at this moment staring at his belly drooping over his belt that you realise; 'someones been feeding me a hell lot of bullshit'. The end switch seems alot closer, and you realise that you weren't meant to go the direction everyone else was going, that even sheep can stray. You say 'fuck it' you flick the switch..........................
And here I am bored shitless. Do I have any regrets? Fuck no.
I used to work as a data entry clerk, they give shitty jobs respectable names, for reasons unknown. Basically some guy/girl scans a document in to the network, it then appears on my screen, and I type it out. You look at your screen , you type what you see. The forms were tax refund forms from the Inland revenue, you'd look out for the muslim names or names that sound like swear words, you got the odd Vanka, you got the odd Focker. This becomes routine for the next 6 weeks, 5 hours a day, 5 days a week. 6x5x5 is 150 hours.
In the background, deadlines approach, 3 weeks become 3 days which become 3 hours, which becomes a week extension when your teacher takes pity on you.
You work hard and eventually you meet your deadline only for another one to be set, you work harder, finish it quicker and then again another deadline is set, the cycle continues. Unbeknown to you the 'end' switch is staring right at you, it's that little glimmer in the back of your head, you could see it clearly if your fat Indian workaholic boss would move his ass.
Growing up you're told anything is possible with hard work, this is one of those white lies people can wash their hands of when it doesn't materialise. You see for Raqueeb entering 15,000 characters in a hour was possible, however when it came to running across the office without gasping for air things got harder, infact impossible.
It is at this moment staring at his belly drooping over his belt that you realise; 'someones been feeding me a hell lot of bullshit'. The end switch seems alot closer, and you realise that you weren't meant to go the direction everyone else was going, that even sheep can stray. You say 'fuck it' you flick the switch..........................
And here I am bored shitless. Do I have any regrets? Fuck no.
posted by Shafik @ 2:43 PM
3 Comments:
At 1:02 AM,
Not Zahra. said…
assalamu alaykum
You should have share these thoughts with real people. It'll make you more interesting. EVEN more interesting.
At 1:31 AM,
Shafik said…
You are real people? But you always ignore me in real life......
At 5:57 PM,
Not Zahra. said…
Assalamu alaykum
It was completely unintentional, I apologise. Roscue.
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